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love Sms/Adult SMS

Adult SMS

It is said that inzamam don't understand english. Once commentator asked, "Hay inzi your wife had a baby last week, is this true?". Inzi said, "first of all i thanks to Allah and then credit goes to all boys,
they really worked hard especially afridi done very well. If they continue we
can have another chance.
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I like your style - I like your class - but most of all i like your ass!
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HOW 2 SATISFY A WOMAN: caress excite cuddle fascinate spoil kiss rub tease pamper console worship respect & love. HOW 2 SATISFY A MAN: blow job .
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Types of arse ...
(_!_)An arse (__!__)Fat arse (!)Tight arse (_?_)Dumb arse (_*_)Sore arse (_zzz_)Tired arse (_E=mc2_)Smart arse (_x_)Kiss my arse!
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Do you like maths?if so add a bed subtract ur clothes divide your legs and we can multiply!
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SEASON DHAMAKA OFFER
Send your girlfriend to me and win a baby
HURRY UP
First ten will get twins
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Old mother Hubbard went 2 d cupboard 2 fetch d poor dog a bone. but when she bent over Rover took over & gave her a bone of his own!
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Why do women have orgasms during sex??? It gives them something to moan about even when they are fuc***g enjoyin themselves.
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Mobilink regrets 2 inform u that the network has gone down on everyone except u. We regret 2 inform u that no one would go down on u not even a network.
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23 useless parts on a mans body.20 nails u cant hammer.2 balls u cant throw &1 cock that cant "crow" dont laff ladies?? UR PUSSY CANT CATCH MICE
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A girl who opens her hands recieves gifts, who opens her heart receives love, who opens her legs receives happiness .
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A teacher asked "wot part of the body goes to heaven first?" A child replied "feet" - coz every nite i c my mum with her feet in the air screamin GOD I'M COMIN!
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A man said 2 his doctor 'everytime I look in the mirror I get an erection' the doctor said 'That's because u look like a cunt!
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Peter Peter Pumpkin eater had a wife & liked to beat her smacked her twice around da head F**ked her arse & went 2 bed!
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Jack & Jill went up da hill 2 have a little fun.But stupid Jill forgot da pill and now they have a son.
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Sex is evil and evil's a sin. but sins are forgiven so lets get stuck in!!

If your right leg was thanksgiving and Your left leg was Christmas could I meet U between the holidays?
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A teacher asked "wot part of the body goes to heaven first?" A child replied "feet" - coz every nite i c my mum with her feet in the air screamin GOD I'M COMIN!
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I want triplets You want twins. Lets get in bed and see who wins!
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He took me from a bar. He took me in his car. He took my top off. He puts his lips on mine, but don't worry: I'm a bottle of wine!
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How to impress a woman: compliment her, kiss her, love her, tease her, protect her, listen to her, support her. How 2 impress a man: Show up naked, bring beer!!.
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What is hard and long and full of semen? >>> Submarine <<<
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Love is a name, Sex is a game. Forget the name and play the game!
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When a man talks dirty to a woman, it's sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $$$ per minute.!
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A cat and a rooster sat by a lake, the cat fell in the lake, the rooster laughed! LESSON: when there's a wet pussy, there's a happy cock!
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Why do men pass gas more than women? Because women won't shut up long enough to build up pressure.
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1 day there was tis naked man N elephant, da elephant looks at the naked man 4 a few seconds, then ask da naked man, 'HOW CAN U BREATH THRU THAT LITTLE THING?'
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I want to suck you... I want to lick you... I wanna move my tongue all over you... I want to feel you in my mouth... that's how u... eat an ice cream...
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if u were a drum id bang u, if u were a pig id pork u, if u were a flower id root u, if u were a nail id screw u, but cos ur a sweetie ill make love 2 u!
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When I was born I got the choice, or a major dick, or a fine memory. I am not able to remember what I did choose.
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Man says to his wife: Let me take a picture of your breasts, then I can always look at them. Wife: Let me take a picture of you penis, I will have it enlarged.
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Who is stronger, Man Or Woman? A: A woman bcoz she lifts 2 mountains on her chest while a man lifts 2 stones with the help of a crane.


A husband was asked: Do u talk to your wife after sex? His answer: Depends, if I can find a phone.
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Son on his honeymoon phoned his mom asking what 2 do. MOM : Put ur biggest thng on her hairiest thing. SON : got my nose in her armpit. Now what?
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Sex is a sensation caused by temptation when a man puts his location in a woman's destination. Do u get my explanation, or do u need a demonstration?!
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There is Hot-sex, Fast-sex, Group-sex, Safe-sex, Leather-sex, Telephone-sex, and for people with your face ...NO SEX !
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Sex is like pizza. When its good, its VERY GOOD. When its bad, its Still pretty good!!
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Come here,take off urs pants and knickers, get on top of me, enjoy until u get satisfied, loving urs.....toilet!

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Lastnite i went 2 bed without u..cold,naked,thinking of u, missing ur warmth, ur soft touch against my skin. Where were u lastnite,

my lovely pyjamas

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Press down down more Ok more YES ahh ohh yes almost there yeah oh shit harder SO GOOD ! mmmmm That's how I sex on text !

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I really deeply wish tat u r here with me in my room. on my bed & lights off & we get under the cover together.. 2 show u my glow in the dark watch.

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He came at night,

explored my body,

got on top of me,

touched me,

he bit, sucked, swalowd,

when he was satisfyed,

he left,

i was hurt,

BLOODY... MOSQUITO !!!!

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BUY A SCOOTY.....PICK UP A BEAUTY, DRINK A FROOTY.... TAKE HER TO OOTY, REMOVE HER NIGHTY...DO UR DUTY..AFTER 9 MONTHS ... GET A CUTY

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The most difficult golf course in the world is... "Women Hole" any

style you play... as many shots you try... & as much perfection you have... you

can never get your balls in...!!!

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What's the closest thing to a woman's period?

Your salary.

It comes once a month,

lasts About 3 or 4 days and if it doesn't come, everything's fucked

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Old mother Hubbard went 2 d cupboard 2 fetch d poor dog a bone. but

when she bent over Rover took over & gave her a bone of his own!

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4 road signs which stands in front of a womans vagina....

1)Caution-dark tunnel. 2)Drive carefully-road wet n slippery. 3)Go slow.4) Men

at work

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Richman to poorman- "How-come ur penis so big? Poorman-replied:

"B'coz in my childhood i had no other toys to play"!!!

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During sexual session the girl says: "u r like a mobile phone!"

Boy: "Do I vibrate a lot?"

Girl: "No,when u get in 2 d tunnel u loose network

Qus: Who is senior,

PENIS or VAGINA.

A:VAGINA

b'cos PENIS always stands up when he sees a VAGINA..So respect the seniors!

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Q: Wats d definition of a 'lesbian?' A: Just another damn Woman.....

tryin 2 do a man's job!!!.

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Modern medicines: Fucknostat, Sexprazole, Sucksproxyvon, Hugglofnac,

Kisstopache, Spermicidin, Breastajin, Ejaculatomol, Vaginalgin, Penisciloc,

Orgasmofen.

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Similarity between Viagra & Rail reservation counter? Both make you

stand for 1 hour for a 2 minute job...

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Love is a Gambling, Don't play with it

Guys get fun, Girls get blame

10 minutes of fun, 9 months of pain

Then a baby comes out without any name.

Enjoy it or think it before you do it.

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A Peach is Peach, A Plum is Plum

A Kiss isn't a Kiss without some tongue

So Open your mouth, Close your eyes

and Give your tongue some exercise,.

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I do not have the muscles of Stallone, I am not as handsome as Brad Pitt, I am not as strong as Schwarzenegger, but I can lick as good as Lassie!!!

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Its been a rough day. I got up this morning, put on a shirt N a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase N the handle came off. I'm afraid 2 go 2 the bathroom.

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Always start your day with a lot of... S E X

S - SMILE

E - ENERGY

X - XCITEMENT

so make S E X a daily habit, and youll always B SUCSEXFUL! in LIFE.

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Come here,take off urs pants and knickers, get on top of me, enjoy until u get satisfied, loving urs.....toilet!

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Lastnite i went 2 bed without u..cold,naked,thinking of u, missing ur warmth, ur soft touch against my skin. Where were u lastnite,

my lovely pyjamas.

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Press down down more Ok more YES ahh ohh yes almost there yeah oh shit harder SO GOOD ! mmmmm That's how I sex on text !

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I really deeply wish tat u r here with me in my room. on my bed & lights off & we get under the cover together.. 2 show u my glow in the dark watch.

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BUY A SCOOTY.....PICK UP A BEAUTY, DRINK A FROOTY.... TAKE HER TO OOTY, REMOVE HER NIGHTY...DO UR DUTY..AFTER 9 MONTHS ... GET A CUTY

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Old mother Hubbard went 2 d cupboard 2 fetch d poor dog a bone. but

when she bent over Rover took over & gave her a bone of his own!

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During sexual session the girl says: "u r like a mobile phone!"

Boy: "Do I vibrate a lot?"

Girl: "No,when u get in 2 d tunnel u loose network


I wish I were a ring Upon my girlfriend's hand, 'Cause everytime she'd wipe her rear I'd see the promised land....

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Are these your eyes, I found them between my breasts!

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Hello!Im a little alien called Kan.I have taken the form of a mobile

phone- your phone.And during this message I have been having sex with

your thumb!

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I once had a ONE-2-ONE night with a VIRGIN.She teased me till i got an ERICKSON.sucked me till my face went ORANGE till i busted my load of SEIMEN over her NOKIAS.

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I hereby place u under arrest 4 violating code 69 - distracting public with ur xtreme good looks & sex appeal, remain silent & report 2 my bedroom.

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A man was looking at a painting 4 a long time of a naked woman with leaves covering the body, he was asked what he was doing & he answered - waitng 4 autumn.

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GUY: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. GAL: If I see you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

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I do not have the muscles of Stallone, I am not as handsome as Brad Pitt, I am not as strong as Schwarzenegger, but I can lick as good as Lassie!!!

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Its been a rough day. I got up this morning, put on a shirt N a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase N the handle came off. I'm afraid 2 go 2 the bathroom.

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American students say : people who never experience good sex and do not perform well in bed, usually read their SMS messages with their right hand.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: Wanna play *Magic*? She says: What's that? He says: We go to my place, have sex and than you disappear!

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A husband was asked: Do u talk to your wife after sex? His answer: Depends, if I can find a phone. Amitabh bachan in KBC

Question for 10 lac to Sardar jee

What is the colour of your wife's underwear?

Option 1 : White

Option 2 : Grey

Option 3 : Black

Option 4 : Blue

Sardar jee : Can i phone a friend?

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Sex is a sensation. It's about a man's temptation, putting his location in a

woman's destination. Do you understand the explanation or do you need a

demonstration?

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A peach is a peach,a plum is a plum,A kiss ain't a kiss without some tongue.So

open up your mouth and close you eyes and give your tongue some exercises!!

There is Hot-sex, Fast-sex, Group-sex, Safe-sex, Leather-sex, Telephone-sex, and for people with your face ...NO SEX ! A girl for First the time was handling a boy's cock. After some time, some drops

came out, she asked wat's that? The boy said:Yeh Khushi ke AANSOO hai.

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Niple niple little star ...can i suck you in my car ...up above the breast so

have...always milky never dry...let me touch it never shy...in the bra it

will be dry ...

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Q: What is a kiss?

A: Very simple, its an enquiry at the top floor about the vacancy in the ground.

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When I went to the Madras,

I fucked a lady on the grass...



When I insert inch One,

She says its none...



When I insert inch Two

She says its few...



When I insert inch Three,

She says its free...



When I insert inch Four,

She says its i want more...



When I insert inch Five,

She says its just like a knife...



When I insert inch Six,

She says its fix...



When I insert inch Seven,

She says i m feeling in a heaven...



When I insert inch Eight,

She says its great...



When I insert inch Nine,

She says its hole of mine...



When I insert inch Ten,

She says are you a donkey or a man...

Submitted By : Syed Mohsin Ali, Submit

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Sex is like a restaurant, sometimes u get good service, sometimes bad service, sometimes no service and many times u hav 2 be happy wid self service.

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If u hav 2 eggs between ur 2 legs u r a man but if u hav 4 eggs

between ur 2 legs don't think u r a superman someone is F**king u

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Did u know meaning of WOMEN?

"W"ant

"O"ne

"M"an for

"E"very

"N"ight

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how is sex related to maths?..add two person and a bed..substract

cloths..divide the legs..multiply the strokes..and the result is

satisfucktion..!aha!!!

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A woman married

a one legged man.

She wrote to her

mother:

"My husband only has

ONE FOOT".

Her Mother

replied:

"You are lucky,

your papa has

ONLY 5 INCHES".

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Girl to Doctor: My mobile got stuck in my vagina since last 4 days in

vibration mode.

Doctor: OK, I will remove this easily.

Girl: Just recharge the battery.

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A gud friend is like a gud bra... hard 2 find- comfortable-

supportive- prevents u from falling- holds u tight- and is always close 2 ur

heart!

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2 men went to fuck a girl.

1st came out after fucking a girl n said...

''My wife is better''

2nd went in ,fuck a girl... Came out n said...

''U were right, your wife is better..

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In chemistry class teacher ask 2 a Girl. what is nitrate?

Girl(sharma k) sir,night rate Rs1500/ hotel k bhi aap pay karo gay.

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How To Teach Mathmatics To A Girl.

1st add lips

2nd minus clothes

3rd divide legs

and then start Multiplication in the Sweetest Point.

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I do not have the muscles of Stallone, I am not as handsome as Brad Pitt, I am not as strong as Schwarzenegger, but I can lick as good as Lassie!!!

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Its been a rough day. I got up this morning, put on a shirt N a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase N the handle came off. I'm afraid 2 go 2 the bathroom.

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Always start your day with a lot of... S E X

S - SMILE

E - ENERGY

X - XCITEMENT

so make S E X a daily habit, and youll always B SUCSEXFUL! in LIFE.

13 you know what that means?


Boy: "<13" ... You Know What
That Means?"

Girl: "No, What...?"

Boy: "It Means That You're The
Only 1 In My ♥" ... ^_^

the people who are thousands 0f miles away


U l 8 i M a 8 e
T r U t H

Sometimes,
The People Who Are
Thousands 0f Miles Away
From You, Can Makes
You Feel Better And
Smile Than People Right
Beside You. . . ♥ ♥

sum1 in your life makes you to forget

True Fact Of Love:-

If Sum1 In Your Life Makes You To Forget Your Past ...That Sum1 Is Probably Your Future ... =]

he broke my heart my friends


After He Broke My Heart My Friends Asked,

"How Many Reasons Do You Have To Still Like Him?"


I Pointed To The Stars & Said "Start Counting."♥

Girl: We Are Best Friends, Right


Girl: We Are Best Friends, Right?

Boy: Yes, Of Course.

Girl: So Be Honest With Me, Who Do You Like?
...
Boy: No One. I Love Someone.

Girl: Oh, She Must Be Very Lucky..

Boy: Definitely. I've Loved Her,
Ever Since I Met Her.

Girl: Really? Well, Since We're Best Friends,
I Wanna Meet Her. Go Call Her.

Boy: Oh Okay.
*Boy Takes Out His Phone,Dials Her Number And Phones Her..*

Girl: Wait, Hold On I Think I'm Getting A Call.
*Answers The Phone*

Boy: I Love You;)

Sweet Love Story:


Sweet Love Story:

A Boy Never Does Homework

In Class
To Get Punishment Of Bending
...On His Knees;
In Front Of 'Her' Bench
Just To See Her For Whole Period... ♥

Gets Scoldings From His Parents;

Coz He Reaches Late Everyday,
Just To Ensure That She Has Reached
Home Safely Or Not... ♥

Skips His Lunch

& Pretends To Be Studying In
The Interval;
Just To See Her Eating The Food... =)

Walks By Foot To The Home Instead

Of Taking A Bus;
Just To Save Money To Buy
Chocolates For Her.." ♥ =)

a completely different story


Its Amazing How She Says
She Doesn't Love Him,
She's 0ver Him,
Practically Hates Him,
But
...The Look In Her Eyes
Tells A Completely Different
Story . . . ♥

~ Common Love Story ~


~ Common Love Story ~

" Last Year,

He said hi to Her [ every time ]
They saw each other in the
hallway. This year it's a quick
glance at each other and then
she turns away, pretending
to have a [ g r e a t t i m e ] with her
friends,
While her heart sinks
to her stomach from missing him.
He spots a girl to talk to to make
her [ j e a l o u s ]
Even though he can't stop looking
back to see
If she's watching.
While they both walk to their
next class, they each secretly
regret it all ... ♥

I Saw Him Again Today


♥ ♥ Girl :

I Saw Him Again Today

I Tried Smiling At Him, But He Just Looked Away
I Regret Doing Everything I Did To Hurt Him
......I Know He Wouldn't Want Me Now
He's The Only Thing On My Mind
I Was Stupid And Naive, It Shouldn't Have Ended
I Wish I Could Tell Him:
How Much I Need Him ♥

♥ ♥ Boy :

I Saw Her Again Today
She Looks So Happy
It Hurts To Know That I Use To Call Her Mine
I Wish I Still Could Call Her Mine
SHe's All I Ever Think About
I Know It Shouldn't Have Ended This Way
I Wish SHe Knew:
How Much I Miss Her♥ .
..

loved each other very much


A Boy & A Girl Loved Each Other Very Much....
Unfortunately The Boy Died.........
Girl Was Upset Too Much & She Couldn't Stop Her Tears....
She Kept On Crying Every Day..........
Many People Gave Sympathy But No Argument Could Stop Her Tears............
One Night She Slept & Had A Dream..........
She Saw The Guy In Heaven With So Many Guys Of His Age.......
He Felt Relaxed.......
But She Noticed That Every Guy Was In Fairy Dress......& Had A Lightened Candle In Their Hand........
But Her Guy Had A Candle Which Was Not Lightened........
She Asked Him:;"Why Your Candle Is Not Lightened?"......
He Said:-"Whenever I Lighten My Candle My Candle Your Tears Falls On It"

Please Don't Cry For Whom You Really Love"

"Because They Dont Want You Too"♥

love story to those you watch in movie

Don't Compare Your Love Story To Those You Watch In Movies.

They're Written By Scriptwriters,


Yours Is Written By God ♥

Must Read


Must Read

This Story Showed That
Father Is D 1st Man,
Who Love Her Daughter More
Than Himself...

One Day An 11 Year Old Girl
Asked Her Daddy,
"What Are You Going To Get Me
For My 15th Birthday?"

The Father Replied,
"There Is Much Time Left."

When The Girl Was 14 She Fainted
And Was Rushed To The Hospital.
The Doctor Came Out And Told Her
Dad She Had A Bad Heart & She Is
Probably Gonna Die...
When She Was Lying In The
Hospital Bed She Said
"Daddy... Have They Told You
I Am Going To Die ?"

The Father Replied; "No You Will Live"
As He Left Weeping.
She Said "How Can You Be Sure."
He Turned Around From The Door
And Said "I Know."
She Turns 15
When She Is Recovering And Comes
Home To Find A Letter On Her Bed.
It Says ;
"My Dearest Daughter,
If You Are Reading This It Means All
Went Well As I Told You. One Day You Asked
Me What I Was Giving You For Your 15th
Birthday,
I Didn't Know Then But Now My
Present To You Is MY HEART."

Her Father Donated His Heart ... !

'BLESSED INDEED IS THE MAN WHO
HEARS MANY GENTLE VOICES CALL HIM
FATHER'

I LOVE MY DAD ... ♥ ♥ DO YOU ... ?

The Great Example Of True Love"


The Great Example Of True Love"

A Man In Thailand Married A Dead Girlfriend To Fulfill His Promise Of Love.


29-Year Old Sarinya Kamsook And Her 28- Year-Old Boyfriend, Chadil Deffy, Were To Be Married This Year.

...
Sarinya Kamsook Unfortunately Died In A Car Crash, Just Day Before The Big Event, Deffy Decided To Go On With Their Wedding As Planned And Married Her.


Sarinya Was Involved In A Car Crash, Leaving Her Severely Injured. She Still Could Have Been Saved With Timely Medical Attention. However, The Doctors Made Her Wait For 6 Hours Due To An Overcrowded ICU Instead Of Transferring Her To Another Hospital.


During This Time, She Succumbed To Her Injuries And Passed Away. During Her Funeral In Surin, Thailand, Chadil Duffy Placed A Ring On His Deceased Bride's Finger. It Thus Turned Out A Wedding/Funeral Ceremony, One Of The Rare Events In The World.


Would You Like To Say Something Friends ?

The Great Example Of True Love"


The Great Example Of True Love"

A Man In Thailand Married A Dead Girlfriend To Fulfill His Promise Of Love.


29-Year Old Sarinya Kamsook And Her 28- Year-Old Boyfriend, Chadil Deffy, Were To Be Married This Year.

...
Sarinya Kamsook Unfortunately Died In A Car Crash, Just Day Before The Big Event, Deffy Decided To Go On With Their Wedding As Planned And Married Her.


Sarinya Was Involved In A Car Crash, Leaving Her Severely Injured. She Still Could Have Been Saved With Timely Medical Attention. However, The Doctors Made Her Wait For 6 Hours Due To An Overcrowded ICU Instead Of Transferring Her To Another Hospital.


During This Time, She Succumbed To Her Injuries And Passed Away. During Her Funeral In Surin, Thailand, Chadil Duffy Placed A Ring On His Deceased Bride's Finger. It Thus Turned Out A Wedding/Funeral Ceremony, One Of The Rare Events In The World.


Would You Like To Say Something Friends ?

Do You Know What Is PAIN


Do You Know What Is PAIN??
Seeing Your Loved One With Someone Else :(

Want To Know What Is LOVE??

Looked Into The Eyes Of Loved One After A Tight Hug :)

Want To Know What Is WORSE??

Imagine Your Loved One Leaving You Forever :'(

Want To Know How Fertile LOVE Is??

Imagine A Life Without Your Loved One :(

Want To Know What's Being HURTY??

When You Realized You Hurt Your Loved One With Your Behavior :(

Want To Know Who Loves You??

Is That Person Whom You Are Thinking About While Reading This :)

Plz Like And Share With Your Loved Ones!

Chance To Dance With You


f I Had The Chance To Dance With You


I Will Choose The Song That Would Never End......♥

how much you love in the beginning


Its Not About How Much You Love In The Beginning....


Its About How Much You Love Till The End.. ♥

hey will really surprise you


Truly Said:

♥ ♥ ♥
"Once You Accept
S O M E O N E
For What They Really
Are...
They Will Really Surprise
You By Being Better Than
YOU Ever Expected...

13 you know what that means?


oy: "<13" ... You Know What

they see a girl i see princess barbie


DeDiCaTeD

They See A Girl. I See Princess Barbie.

They Say Mistake. I Say Perfect Accident.
They Think Regrets. I Think Memories. ♥
That Means?"

Girl: "No, What...?"


Boy: "It Means That You're The

Only 1 In My ♥" ... ^_^

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